Princess Ky Background - The cutest blog on the block

Thursday, December 20, 2012

No Room in the Inn- An Adoption Story

When I reminisce about miracles I have seen or observed, the most precious of all is the birth of a baby and how God makes families.  Some families are created by birth and some families are created through adoption.

Adoption is not second best, it is GOD's best.  God chooses the perfect baby for each mommy and daddy and the perfect mommy and daddy for each baby.

I can say this with confidence because my own little family was created through adoption.

Adoption Day -October 2006

The hospital part of our adoption story is a true nightmare. I don't share it often as I am concerned it will discourage couples from adopting.

As a brief overview, our baby was taken from us hours after birth, we were separated from our birth parents, we were accused of kidnapping our daughter, I was told by hospital staff that I was "not her mother" (this one thing about killed me), our birth mother's attorney (who was there for paperwork to be signed and who had been invited by our birth mother) was escorted out of the hospital by armed security guards.

The experience was so horrific that I have a hard time reminiscing about the first days of my daughter's life because it was so emotionally painful. What should have been one of the most cherished times of my life instead became one of the most traumatic.
Kylie's 4D Ultrasound
Throughout that terrible experience, there was one event that, while awful, made me reflect intensely on my Father God and His Son, Jesus.

When we were finally given permission to be with our new baby, the hospital told us that we would have to parent her in a waiting room as there were no hospital rooms available.  (We later learned this was a lie and another attempt by the hospital staff to sabotage our adoption experience)

We spent 4 days in a waiting room with our daughter who was low birth weight and who could not maintain her body temperature.  We had no food, no blankets, no water, no cell phone coverage, no privacy and no restroom.  The waiting room was not cleaned once while we were there and hospital staff repeatedly drew blood from our baby in that unsanitary area.

We wore the same clothes for 4 days and slept sitting up in a chair with one eye open concerned someone might try to (again) take our baby.  We had to take turns going to another part of the floor to use the restroom, wash our hands or even get water to make a bottle and had to be buzzed in and out by nurses because they wouldn't give us access badges as they do for most newborn parents.
Kylie's "Manger" in the waiting room.  Friends sent us the balloon.
On the day, we were finally able to the leave the hospital, there were no friends there to greet us or congratulate us, no balloons or pictures, but it was honestly one of the happiest days of my life!!
Kylie was so tiny, that she had to go through a "car seat test" before we could take her home (they  tested her for 30 minutes to make sure she didn't stop breathing
 in a simulated car 
We couldn't understand why the hospital staff was so against us- why they didn't want us.  We had spent so much money just to make the trip and had come a great distance full of love- wanting to share it with our new born baby.  Yet, they treated us like we were the enemy.
When we finally learned that the adoption was FINAL!!
Dan and I, while wounded emotionally, determined to be optimistic. We began to joke that our adoption was similar to the story of Jesus.

Mary and Joseph had traveled a great distance so hopeful for their future as a family.  When they arrived, they were told there was "no room in the Inn".  They lived for days without the comforts and necessities that typical people have and take for granted. And, in the end, no matter how much Jesus loved on people and met their needs, he was despised and rejected - especially by the leadership.
The waiting room was FREEZING cold!
Our story was eerily similar and yet it was a HUGE comfort to us to be blessed (yes, I said blessed) to be able to experience a tiny bit of what Mary, Joseph and Jesus experienced.  It gave us a whole different perspective and attitude toward those who were mistreating us without cause or reason.

As we sat in that waiting room with no family or friends nearby to wrap around us, we spent a lot of time talking and praying about what our heart's desire was for our precious girl who had been gifted to us through adoption.

We had no idea that in a few short months, we would learn that our daughter would experience special needs.  But, even though it was unexpected, it all makes perfect sense as a part of HIS perfect will.  He not only gifted us with precious Kylie but he gifted us with the unique skills, experiences and tools that we would need to meet her every need.  God never makes mistakes when he creates families. We may feel inadequate most of the time, but HE knows differently and guides our thoughts and actions.

I recently found this song by Rachel Aldous and it so closely mirrors the prayers and thoughts we dared to whisper heavenward for our baby girl during those few days of isolation and mistreatment.  I hope you are touched by it too

If you are interested in the background of Rachel's song (Titled Hannah's Song) click here.  Her story affects me deeply.

Thursday, December 13, 2012

Nutcracker Memories

I just want to share a few memories from taking Kylie to see the Nutcracker this year.

To her, she is going to a real, live performance, but really she is going to a dress rehearsal as she could never sit through the entire show.

However, we do it up all fancy.  She wears her sparkliest dress (my spell check tells me that "sparkliest" is not a word, but they clearly have never lived with a little girl!) and her sparkly shoes.  Her Doll, Halle, dresses just like her and sometimes we even don a Tiara!!

It is THAT BIG of a deal!!

We have 4 specific memories from this show some are endearing and some are downright hilarious!  I hope you enjoy them as we did!

Memory #1:

As we were exiting Hoyt Sherman Place (the venue for the Nutcracker performance), we noticed that in the lower lobby there was an American Girl Doll displayed on the table in a "Clara" dress.

 Kylie walked over to the table with her doll, Halle, and exclaimed "Clara! I want to 'troduce (introduce) you to my friend, Halle!"

 It was soooo sweet! Especially, for a little girl who experiences speech and social difficulties! 

 Such a special moment!!

Memory #2:

 After watching the dress rehearsal, we got in the car and I said to Kylie: "The Nutcracker is all done. Tell Daddy where he should take us next!"

I was thinking that Kylie would say "to Perkins!"-(her very FAVORITE restaurant). However, much to our shock and in a very serious tone, she replied "to New York City, Please!!"

 .....Ummmm....don't think so princess!! ha! ha!

Memory #3:
I have been helping Kylie memorize the Christmas Story from the Bible (Luke 2). 

 In part of the ballet, there are several little girls that come on stage dressed as angels. 

 When the first angel appeared, Kylie exclaimed "Look!! The Angel of the LORD!!"

It was so funny! We are STILL cracking up at her declaration!!

Memory #4:
While at the Nutcracker rehearsal, Miss Rachel from Ballet Des Moines, invited Kylie to go backstage. It was such an honor and we were so excited to experience a little bit of what the dancers go through in the wings.
When we arrived backstage, Kylie was intrigued by the man dressed as a woman (who also hides little dancers under his/her huge skirt)
When they realized that Kylie was so intrigued by this, the person playing the role, began to emerge toward her so she could see the costume better. Kylie made a quick exit and was out.of.there.!!

We thought that she was just overwhelmed with the organized chaos that goes into making a show!

However, when we got home, she informed us that "The lady man was coming to get her" - We loved how she called the role "Lady Man"-- Pretty perceptive!! ha!
Kylie is spellbound!
Dress Rehearsal was simply AMAZING!! Ballet Des Moines and all their dancers and staff are so incredible!!
Not only did they invite us to take Kylie to the dress rehearsal for the Nutcracker but tonight they also invited Kylie to go back stage during the rehearsal.
Not only that, they invited her ON STAGE and allowed her to walk to the center holding THE.VERY.NUTCRACKER.DOLL. used in the show and prompted her to take a bow (which to our great delight, she did).....

In her little girl life, this was as big a deal as winning the lottery!
This momma cried tears of joy that my girl got to experience such kindness and generosity when they had HUGE stress on their plates preparing for their opening night!

Ballet Des Moines has been BEYOND good to my daughter and they show her care, patience and accommodation EVERY step of the way!

The gave her an experience she will never forget and most of all they put people before things (they might have held back the Nutcracker Doll fearing she might break it) but they didn't.
As parents, we are more than thrilled, elated, impressed and in awe of what School of Classical Ballet and Dance Without Limits has done for our precious girl!


Wednesday, December 12, 2012

A Visit with Santa

It was so sweet!  Kylie asked Santa for a "Woody Doll".  This is HUGE progress for her! She is usually TERRIFIED of Santa!! (She has no idea that we have had Woody for months and can hardly wait to give him to her so her Jessie doll has a friend!)

Kylie is dressed as an Angel/Ballerina because we saw Santa at "Festival of Trees", a benefit for Blank Children's Hospital and Kylie was scheduled to dance with Dance Without Limits later in the afternoon. Dance Without Limits is a ballet program designed for children who experience special needs.